house – We Only Get One Chance

WHEN I WAS SIX

During a yoga class a few days ago, the instructor says “I remember when I was six and I was sitting on my bed listening to this song.” I cannot remember exactly what song she was talking about but I do remember first hearing that song when I was in my upper 20s.

Ugh.

In that very moment, I was reminded of just how many times I have already been around the sun…and another trip will come to completion in just a couple months.

This kind of an idea can be a real downer, although I am certain she didn’t mean it in that way. She was just in a sincere moment of remembering inside of her own life.

We all have those songs that take us back to a time and place in our lives. If you are a patient of mine at Cafe of LIFE Chiropractic here in Fenton, you have heard some “different”, “interesting” and maybe “unusual” music during your visits.

This has 2 primary reasons: FIRST, if it was music that you know and have heard before, probably I have too, and you would have a singing chiropractor all day long. And though I have been told that my voice is reasonable (and of course my fiance says I have a “voice of an angel”), nobody is interested in hearing me sing all day long, and especially my team. And SECOND, a song in your life can be a trigger for something amazing while that very same song can trigger the next person back into some of the worst moments in their lives. I have deliberately chosen music that is unfamiliar except inside of this healing space (or its quite possible you have heard some songs inside of the local yoga studios or meditation centers, other places for healing).

That was a complete tangent on music and is not the message I am really wanting to write about today.

What I want to talk about is, in that moment when the young yoga instructor was sharing her initial memories of a song at age 6 and mine was upper 20 something, my internal dialogue went to “Oh to be 25 again…” and “Wow I am old!!”

I hear you little internal critical voice. You do really work against me most of the time don’t you?

In the very same moment I was inside of an intense and powerful yoga pose, with my strong arms and legs, my “relatively” peaceful mind, after a busy day serving people going on 15 years in practice, inside the 4 walls of my incredibly beautiful office, in a time that I am closing in on marrying the man of my dreams and planning for a beautiful life, in this body that has taken me incredible places and climbed one of the highest peaks in the world, gotten my doctorate degree, lived all over the country, and…and…and.

In that very same moment, that sweet little comment from the yoga instructor took me down into a valley of how old I am getting AND then the work that I have done in gratitude and appreciation for my life and what I have done in such a short amount of time, took me to the highest of highs. It was a beautiful roller coaster and one that I felt like I was watching from an outsider’s perspective, but I was living it.

I didn’t even know I could have an opinion about music until I was 9 years old and my older brother got two cassette tapes: Michael Jackson “Thriller” and Prince “Purple Rain”. It is the first music in my life that I remember I would consciously choose to listen to myself. Everything before that was just Cars 108 on the radio in my mom and dad’s cars.

It is funny how life works and it is sometimes frightening how fast life goes. I have a clear memory when I was 6 years old, in first grade and I had some neighbors that were in fifth and sixth grades. I remember thinking “WOW!!! Those girls are old and it will be fun to be in fifth or sixth grade and not in first.”

So here we are, I am not 6 anymore, not 16, 26 or 36 anymore. The years tick by and the sweetness of the memories carry through the accomplishments of life and all the juice that is squeezed out of each and every day. I am so grateful for that sweet, little w”when I was 6″ comment she made that day as it makes me also really appreciate not being 6 anymore and that I have had such a full life already. Do you have a music memory? Whats your very first favorite song? Music really matters…to me anyway.

LACE CURTAINS

I moved into my home over 4 years ago. If you have even been to my home or driven by, you may have noticed the lace curtains in the window at the front of the house (although more than likely you have not, they are unremarkable). I am not a fan of lace curtains.

I have a very different style to my home and my practice that doesn’t really fit with lace curtains.

So let me explain…this particular lace-covered window is above my 2-car garage. There is an unfinished bonus room above my garage currently being used for storage. It has 2 nice sized windows, one at the front by the driveway and one towards the back that faces house. The one on the driveway side is the one with the lace curtains, nothing on the other.

For the first few years I lived there, I hadn’t give those lace curtains a lot of attention. I would see them when I pulled in and out of my garage, however aside from that, they are not on my mind at all. They are just sort-of there.

Over the past couple years, I have noticed them as the last thing I see when I leave and the first thing when I pull back into my driveway. They are pretty, harmless and unremarkable.

But they are not me. Not at all.

For the past 2 years, I have tried to figure out what window coverings I should replace those with. What color should I put there? Should it have some sort of texture? Should it give you a hint to textures and colors used in the house? Should they just be plain white like the siding on that part of the house? Should they be loud and obnoxious? Should they be long or short? I am not a designer, but I have a feel that I always go for with my home and work spaces and these silly curtains had raised a lot of questions.

It is also one of those things that I need to be able to feel out, one of those things that I needed to try out a couple different colors and textures to know for sure. But who really wants to go to the store and buy a few different options and drive in and out of the driveway until I got it right??? Not me!

In the past 6 weeks I have started to do some research. There are a lot of homes with that same bonus room/window set-up above the garage (and maybe now that I mention it, you will notice it yourself). My research consisted of driving around and seeing what other people have done with said window.

My private research has shown that most leave that window uncovered. It isn’t a room that you would need to block the world out of. It also is a place that there is not enough light on a regular basis to make out anything but silhouettes of what is being stored, which is no big deal.

So I didn’t want to completely commit to uncovered windows after being covered for so many years, so I went up there and pulled the curtains all the way to the side so that they appeared uncovered from the outside. And I have now been driving in and out of my garage and have a huge smile on my face because of how many years I have pondered this silly decision.

It is funny to me because this entire time I had always wanted to just replace the covering and change the look of it all and had never once, prior to just 6 weeks ago, ever even considered that idea.

I think it is funny how the mind works like that sometimes…it wants to replace every little thing in life instead of just getting rid of it altogether. I have noticed this lately in my life as I am getting more minimalist (Mom, I never said I am a true minimalist, just better with less) with the things I have in my home all the way down to my wardrobe and shoes. I do not have to replace stuff with more stuff, and so many times it just feels better to dump it than to add more.

I am super grateful for this new perspective. I am also really grateful to have made a final decision and allowing full sunlight in that bonus room. It is the silliest place to learn a life lesson, I had no idea I could learn so much from those lace curtains.

MY HOUSE

Many people are asking about my house.

Back in the beginning this year I wrote a blog called “I’m Not Crazy” about how, in spite of all kinds of different ideas and opinions everyone has about moving from a lake home, I had plans to sell my house.

I think it is so interesting how life works sometimes.

Very shortly following that final decision to sell, I met a really interesting man. Most of you know that I have been single and dating for years, sometimes what seems like years and years. This guy came into my life and just a couple weeks later I got a great offer on my home. He and I were playing with the idea of keeping the house in case we Chiropractor Fenton Michigan My House went the distance together. It was so early in our relationship that we really didn’t know much about our future. It got down to the wire of having to counter the offer or take the house off the market. As the minutes ticked by, I was in sheer panic trying to figure out if I should really sell and move on or keep it and stay put.

As the final minute to counter that offer approaches, I pulled the house off the market. It was a heart-centered decision about my life I was ultimately really happy with my choice. The couple that had made the offer came up with another offer meeting me half way from their original offer and the asking price. My response remained “it is not on the market anymore.” Then they came within $3,000 of full asking price…but I remained happy with my choice.

That particular gentleman and I didn’t end up going the distance. However, months later, I am still so grateful for him being in my life at that moment when that decision needed to be made.

Today I sit and write to you while overlooking the lake. It is fall and it is time to get the boats out of the water, roll up the docks, and batten down the hatches to take on Old Man Winter. I face west and that unencumbered west winter wind is absolutely brutal from here most of the time. I have a few new windows ordered to replace some old cabin windows, some insulation and other fall chores to be done and a new incredibly sweet handyman in my life ready and willing to help me tackle it all. For all of that and so much more, I am grateful.

Life takes twists and turns and I have chosen that, instead of trying to force decisions, I can get quiet, look around, listen to my inner voice, check in with my heart and make that next step.

From what I mentioned above, I am sure your mind goes to the question of “Is that ‘incredibly sweet handyman’ going to be it for me?” I can say one thing for sure…for right now, I am so very grateful for his presence in my life. That is all I know.

Seems as soon as I try to make some sort of plan for my future; home, relationship or otherwise, I get blind-sided and spun around in a completely different direction. For now, what I am certain about is that I am staying in my house.

When you look back on your life, can you see key moments and people or experiences that significantly changed the course of the path your life was moving on? Boy, I do. It is sometimes so hard to see through all the energy of the moment, however in retrospect it seems 20/20. For now I will sit back in my house, breathe, have gratitude and trust the next move will be obvious when it needs to happen.