love – Page 4 – We Only Get One Chance

A SMILE

Never underestimate the power of a smile.

Did you wake up smiling today? Have you smiled yet? Why? How many times? At who? In what setting?

I am realizing as time ticks by, and the wrinkles start to set into my face, the most noticeable ones are my smile lines and I am pretty alright with that.

“A smile is the shortest distance between two people.”

Fenton Chiropractor Smile — Scott and Danielle 2012

A smile stands for connection, joy, hope, happiness, love, compassion, peace and understanding. However, it can also portray nervousness, anxiety and uncertainty. The default expression that crosses my face for any and all of the above is a smile, hence by deep smile lines, often accompanied by giggles or uncontrollable laughter. That is just my style.

I see a lot of pregnant mothers in my chiropractic practice and I get to watch as they spend their first weeks together with their new babies. I think the first time the baby smiles is one of a new parent’s proudest moments. But once they start doing it, they usually do a lot of smiling. That is what we do as humans and it gets to a point that the initial excitement wears off a bit and smiles become a normal part of life, we begin to take that expression for granted.

The last blog post I wrote was about My First Best Friend and how my cousin’s husband suffered a brain bleed and we almost lost him. I shared a bit of their story and I wanted to do a quick update so that you know that he is alive and slowly recovering.

His recovery is being facilitated by his beautiful wife and today marks their 3rd wedding anniversary. They will spend the day in the hospital, as all the days of the past 6 weeks have been spent there. He is nowhere ready to move or be transported yet…and so he is there in his bed and sometimes in a chair…and she sits. She spends endless hours talking to him, encouraging him, doing small movement exercises with him, cheering him on as he responds to commands and just loving him. It is the essence of true love and is one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen.

My life does not allow me to visit daily but I keep in touch and let her know I am supporting from a distance. Yesterday I got the following message from her:

“I finally got him to smile. It was the most wonderful thing I have ever seen…”

This message made me realize how much we take smiles from our loved ones for granted. We walk on by and maybe smile back, maybe even hold back a smile out of resentment or disdain. I never realized how important a smile was until that message yesterday.

There are so many hours of silence in that hospital room. In 6 weeks time, there are only so many one-sided conversations to be had, but that doesn’t stop her. She plays music for him and reads to him while he wakes up a bit and falls back to sleep.

Many people have sent cards, well-wishes and inspiration and one wall has a small collection that they review on a regular basis. It is one of the things that really stimulates him so I would like to make a simple request. If you are reading this, please take a blank piece of paper and write them a little encouragement and put it in an envelope and send it in the mail to:

Danielle and Scott Hawkins
C/O Cafe of LIFE Chiropractic
521 N. Leroy St.
Fenton, MI 48430

For the cost of a stamp (of course greeting cards are always welcome as well), we can hopefully collectively encourage these smiles and healing moments inside of him.

As I wrote in my Facebook status last week, to most of you, Danielle and Scott are perfect strangers. I promise, promise, promise that if you knew them, you would love them too.

Please send a smile to them, a little encouragement, a little love…and then spend a little more time in your smile mode today and in the future. The great thing about smiles is you will never run out. Spread them around!!! We only get one chance…

MY FIRST BEST FRIEND

I had no idea when I was born, that my first best friend was already here waiting for me.

My cousin, Danielle, is 6 weeks older than i am and we pretty much grew up attached at the hip any chance we got. Neither of us had sisters so we became that to each other.

My house was right next door to my grandparent’s home and so every time she visited them, which was quite often, I got to see her. We did everything together, from barbies to cabbage patch kids, from building sand castles to playing in tree forts, from blazing trails through the woods and carving trees to making

Fenton Chiropractor Best Friend up stories as we spent hours out playing in the apple orchard.

We talked about our hopes and dreams and made plans for our lives. I was always so jealous she got to go to Girl Scout Camp every summer…but she made up for it by teaching me all the songs she learned when she returned. In fact, that radio in my head that plays music non-stop sometimes gets locked on that channel and as a 30-something…those songs stuck on repeat are more annoying than cool.

To this day, we make time for each other. She is one of my biggest cheerleaders, and although she doesn’t allow many to cheer for her, I am one of hers. There seems to be a length of time, that if we go past too many days without having time to sit down and catch up with each other, we both go a little crazy and make time in our schedules right away.

I sent her a text message on Friday morning about how excited I was about going to the Water Hill Music Festival in Ann Arbor next weekend, and although I knew it was still another week away, I was stoked to have some time to hang out. I had just seen her 5 days prior as her and her husband, Scott, along with a group of my nearest and dearest, spent the evening celebrating my birthday at my home.

On Friday, she didn’t respond back to that text message right away and after a few minutes she called. She doesn’t ever call, we don’t need to talk on the phone, we already know what each other is usually thinking so text and email are our norm.

Her voice was cracking. She was seriously shakin’ up. Then she proceeded to tell me that Scott, her husband, had a brain hemorrhage and is in the hospital and asked if I could come up. I had a couple obligations that day and headed up as soon as i could.

I have spent the past 2 days with my heart breaking right along side her, and I feel like these days are just the beginning of a long road. She is one of the strongest and bravest that i know. She has had her share, plus some, of adversity and challenge in her life. She keeps her head up through all of it. She plugs away and she always comes out on top. She is one incredible woman and I know those who really know her feel lucky.

Her and her husband have the most beautiful love story, reconnecting after so many years and blending their family, his 2 kids and her 2 kids. They have a really sweet love that is palpable when you are around them. They perfectly compliment each other.

Right now she spends her moments sitting at his bedside, and only leaves to close her eyes and sleep on an uncomfortable pull-out/fold down chair thing a couple rooms away. She talks to him, dodges all the tubes and medical apparatus to kiss him, loves on him, plays music for him (he is a music man) and holds his hand for hours on end.

He has shown signs of improving. Will he come out of the state he is in? We don’t know. Will he return to the Scott we are used to? We don’t know that either. How long will it take? We all wish we knew that answer but we don’t know anything at this point.

What I do know, what I am sure of is that she will be ok. There are going to be moment to moment, hour to hour, and day to day ups and downs. She is the strongest and bravest that I know of. I will not be able to stand with her all the time during this process as I have obligations in my life I need to tend to, but I leave my heart with her when I am not there.

I am writing this blog from the rawest place in my being. My heart has been ripped out of my chest these past 2 days and i want to share this story because my family needs all the praying, meditating, affirmation-saying people we can get. I am sending out a request to all the troops to please help lift up my first best friend and her husband. They could really use your help right now. Peace.

A ROSE

The rose is known for it’s beauty and energy. It is a symbol for “love and beauty” and different colors mean different things. I remember growing up, when I got a rose that was white, it meant something similar to the “like” button on Facebook, yellow meant “friendship” and red meant “love”. When roses were delivered in high school from someone, the color truly was significant…but the bottom line was everyone loves roses.

This evening I was having wine and a bite to eat with a friend, and since it was Mother’s Day, the restaurant was giving red roses out to all the females…basically making the assumption that they were mothers.

One of the servers at the restaurant taps me on the shoulder and says “Ma’am, would you like a rose?” Instantly, and based on my assumption that “roses are for mothers only” I said “No thank you. I don’t deserve one. I am not a mom.”

WOAH!!! HOLD YOUR HORSES!!!! …now all of a sudden I have made an assumption that in order to “deserve” a rose, to be “worthy” of receiving a rose from a random restaurant server, I must have birthed a child into this world or somehow married into a step-mother role.

When absolutely ridiculous statements like that fall out of my mouth, a HUGE red flag goes up indicating it is a good time for me to take a step back and evaluate where on Earth it came from.

The friend I was sitting with was just the perfect person to have this conversation with as he reminded me that I am worthy of a rose…and so much more. “You are like a palm tree in the North Pole…you give hope and you give life and put a smile on people’s faces”. “Leaders and movers in the world were never placed on a yacht in the Bahamas, they were always where hungry and thirsty souls are.” and “Bloom where you are planted.”

Thank you my dear friend.

So I took the rose and I placed it on my purse and it became the center of conversation and a focal point for the rest of the evening.

Have you looked at a rose lately? If you sit and are really present with a rose and you take the time to check out the intricacies of it’s structure…it is truly magnificent, a beautiful natural work of art. As I brought the rose up to my nose for a smell, I was taken back by the beauty of the layers and layers of pedals that created this amazing thing…and to think all of that came from a very small rosebud is absolutely astounding.

In its infant stages, all of that gorgeous structure was already planned and mapped out. A rosebud holds so much potential that is only expressed if it is nurtured and given what is necessary for growth. …and the same holds true for each one of us. There is such a magnificent, grand plan that will unfold in perfect timing and perfect beautiful structure if it is nurtured and given what is necessary for growth. And if you look around, you will find this is also true for everything around you.

So let the beauty of a rose remind you of your inborn, INNATE potential to be magnificent and grand and beautiful and loved. When you walk by the floral department in your local grocery, take a second glance at the beauty that is the rose in all of its gorgeous shades. But do more than that…pick one out of the group, buy it, take it home, put it in water and place it by your kitchen sink. Let it be your early morning reminder, your lunchtime reminder and your after dinner reminder of the beautiful potential that is you. Nurture that potential and give yourself what is necessary to grow…and then get busy blooming where you are planted.

I HAVE A STORY TO TELL

I live a very blessed life. It has changed for the better this past month and I know that you can probably tell that is true through my posts. I am amazed, in awe and disbelief that life could possibly be like this. I could try to phrase the story in a way that would make sense on here but it would take pages and pages. Instead…when you have about 20 minutes and a box of tissues…go to http://www.ridenthewave.us/ and you will see a post called “Happy Valentine’s Day 2012” and 4 videos…that was my Heart Day present from my beau this year and I just wanted to share.

I have had an image in life about what I wanted my relationship to look and feel like. I have to admit that over the years, with all that I have been through, it has gotten a little bit jaded. Now when I look back, all the lessons I have learned along the way were totally worth it. “People are put in our lives for a reason, a season or a lifetime”. Many times in the beginning it feels like it is for a lifetime, and then things change. Often things are hard to figure out in the moment, however if we stick with it long enough, the reason usually reveals itself in retrospect. I see it now. I am not naive enough (though I am hopeful) to think that what is happening now will always stay this way…however if the foundation is strong, the ground can stay steady enough to be able to weather the storms together. I think that is what love is really all about.

WHAT A WEEK!!!

To say this past week was incredible would be a complete understatement. I am not sure if I can find the words to do it any justice but I will attempt.

It has been exciting, exhilarating, perfect time and perfect place, talking, connection, love, growth, reading, developing, email, introspective, travel, peace, writing, heart-centeredness, exhausting, awesome, long hours, talking, Skype, sharing, Internet, love, books, friends, family, hungry, bliss, planning, creating, nurturing, staring, introducing, hugs, sounds, video, discussions, parents, happiness, pictures, flowing, riding waves, flowers, notes, work, p

Chiropractor Fenton Michigan - Dr Erica Peabody - What a week

lay, counsel, ideas, music, kisses, movies, voice, Facebook, Hey Tell, random facts, quotes, scrapbooks, house, lake, ice, snow, conversation, celebration, glowing, communication, energy, vulnerable, open, raw, wounds, opportunity, practice, planting seeds, simple life, pure, days, one week, favorites, feeling of readiness, special, percentages, names, togetherness, news, unpack, concerns, highlights, tremendous growth, breath, appreciation, thoughts, truth, thinking, greatness, settling in, luck, promises, responses, pleasure and singing.

It feels as though the stars have aligned and they are all on my side. Because of a few different things and my own desire for growth and evolution, and the work I am doing on myself, I can honestly say that January 12th, 2012 was a pivotal point in my life. It is as though my life can be described as “before Jan. 12th” and “after Jan. 12th”. It goes way deeper than a love connection though that is a significant part of it. Where is life heading? I know what direction it is going, however I have chosen to surrender to the fact that “I will ride the wave where it takes me”. It is uncharted territory for me, unfamiliar and uncomfortable. All I can do is trust that “As I take a step, the next one is revealed”.

Have you had an event or a culmination of events that has led to a significant shift in your being or your life? Is there a date or a time frame that you can look back at and see an obvious shift? For me, being able to share my story brings me so much joy. Maybe you feel the same way…we only get one chance in this life. Do more things that make you happy!

SUPER HERO CHRISTMAS

Last night I bought a wimpy Christmas tree. I say wimpy because it is only an 7 foot tree and looks so small. Over the last few years, I have been used to my 20+ foot ceilings and I would get 10+ foot trees because I had just the perfect spot. This year I am back to standard

8 foot ceilings and that is very limiting outside of cutting a hole in the ceiling. One of our favorite couples came into the Cafe this morning and I got laughing so hard as I was reminded me of a Christmas tree incident that happened last year. It goes something like this…

I cannot remember exactly what the evening consisted of, however I know that there was some sort of drama involved that left me feeling a little “run over”. I remember pulling into my garage after midnight with a distressed feeling and ready to go to bed and start the next day new. I walked into my house, set my keys down, kicked off my shoes and was heading upstairs when I noticed that my 12 foot Christmas tree had taken a tumble and many ornaments were smashed on the floor. “Where is that dog?!?!” …oh, right, he is still in his kennel being a good boy. There weren’t any earthquakes so the only one I could blame it on was the little physics wizard inside of me that was on vacation when I put it into the tree stand…apparently off balance. Then my inner comedian chimed in with “If a 12 foot Christmas tree falls in a living room and no one is around, does it make a sound?”

I quickly accepted the destruction and decided since it was already after midnight and nobody is around to help…this is the PERFECT time to remedy the situation. So with one big heave, I was able to get it mostly upright…well upright as long as I was holding it there…but if I was holding it, who is going to re-do the screws in the tree stand so that it won’t tip over again????? BRILLIANT ERICA!!!! Your SUPERWOMAN complex is really getting you into trouble this time around!!! So next decision to make was… 1. Let the tree fall again and go out on a limb and ask for help tomorrow, or… 2. Be grateful for long arms and find some of that SUPERHERO strength and somehow make it happen. Let’s put it this way…you all know which one I chose (I mean really, if you have been following this blog at all, you know me quite well), I dove in waist deep in pine needles, it was a dumb idea, and I was sore for days!!! …and if you do know me, I am sure you can get the visual and have probably let out a chuckle and the ridiculous-ness.

Moral of the story…if you are one person, don’t try to do a two-person job! Learn to ask for help when it is appropriate because helping others is human nature and if you ask, I can guarantee someone will step in and be glad to. Running my chiropractic office, I have people coming in all the time because they tried to do a two-person job on their own. Learn from my mistakes…or just buy smaller Christmas trees!!! ‘Tis the Season!!!

TRIATHLON SUCCESS

As many of you know, I have spend the past couple months training really hard for the First Try Triathlon. Well I am happy to report that my training paid off. The event was this past Saturday over in Linden. I have done many races but as we got closer to this event, I was really nervous. To do 300 yard swim had become kind of a simple thing, 9 mile bike ride-no problem, 2 mile run-piece of cake…but to put them all together and do them back to back, I wasn’t so sure.

So my morning looked like this…

Alarm goes off, get dressed, early breakfast and hydrate, load up gear, blast loud music as I drive over to Clover Beach, survey the scene, unload my gear, set up my transition area, get body marked with my number and age, put swim cap and goggles on, strip down to swim gear (it was about 60 degree with a treacherous wind and very difficult to part with my sweatshirt), line up in heats, swim, dodge weeds, catch my breath and swim some more, run up the beach to transition area, change to biking gear and bike 9 miles (shoot I forgot to put my sunglasses on), back to transition area, change to running gear, try not to throw up (I was very nauseous), run 2 miles still trying not to throw up (and thinking I wish I had time to use the bathroom), finish, cheer on my family and friends, find my mom and run the end of her race with her, and enjoy and celebrate the completion of my first triathlon.

WOW! That was so much fun! During the entire race I was sure that I was in the middle of my heat…not near the front nor the back…but figured I was right in the middle. I have abnormal anatomy in my heart that limits my oxygen carrying capacity so even though I do a lot of running races, I mostly do them to complete them rather than compete. At the end of the triathlon I go to check my times and of course I start in the middle of the list and work my way down…my name is not there. I thought that was a bit odd, so I scroll down it again. Well there is no way I should look above half way on that list…I have never been above that point. So I scrolled up the list and low and behold I found myself finishing at number 52!!!!!! I thought to myself “this can’t be right, there is no way”…but it was and I actually finished 4th in my age group!!!! AHHHHHHHH!!! I was and still am thrilled. I am not one to throw placings around (mostly because I am usually so far back on the list) but this time I have to.

So my overall view is the triathlon itself was incredibly well organized, I had so much fun, I smiled the entire time, I finished and felt great and the icing on the cake is the fact that I actually did really well. Of course you will currently find me trying to figure out when I can fit another one into my schedule.

I am always up for an adventure. I learn so much about myself and about life by taking on challenges like the triathlon. Life is about learning, growing and evolving. Have you been stepping outside your comfort zone to find your limits? The great thing is when we do, we find that our limits are in a constant process of changing and we can usually go farther and do more than we previously gave ourselves credit for. We may as well test our limits…we only get one chance.

A GREAT WEEKEND

It was a GREAT weekend, I mean really great. It was the most perfectly balanced weekend that I can remember in a long time. It started with a coaching meeting and getting my hair done on Friday morning. The evening marked the last class of Yoga Teacher Training with concluded with 108 sun salutations to a live bongo band. Awesome! And maybe you are not familiar with what a sun salutation is so let me breifly describe it. It follows the length of about 5-6 breaths and includes 11 postures, standing, forward fold, top of a plank then bottom, up dog, down dog and back to the top of the mat. Multiply that by 108 = A LOT of work. Good work though. Saturday morning began with the Le Leche League doing their cloth diaper sale in the front yard of the Cafe of LIFE. It was great because I came and helped set up and didn’t have to stay and work. So I chose to head up north. There is a bike ride called Zoo-De-Mack(http://www.zoo-de-mack.com/) that happens once a year and I have gone up and participated for 7 years. This year I didn’t get to do the ride but I went up for the celebration anyways. Mackinaw Island is such a cool place. There is so much to do and see there, I really enjoy it. The evening was filled with friends and dancing and everyone was in such great spirits. I woke early on Sunday and made it home to finish the weekend hanging out with my family and having dinner on the lake.

This is the frist weekend where I actually felt like I was able to catch up with myself. Seems life is so full anymore that I feel I fall behind a little with myself. Great to relax and have some fun and catch up. This morning I woke up loving the fact that it is Monday. Monday mornings are so full of potential. Some people really dread Mondays however I feel like there are so many possibilities for the week when I am staring at the ceiling waking up on Monday mornings. In that same moment, I am so grateful that I play a part in choosing to make the week a good one or not. It was a great weekend. May as well do our best to make all of our weeks great…we only get one chance.

EVERYONE….MEET CHOCO!!!!

Everyone…meet Choco!!!! So I have decided to get a dog. This is Choco and he is a 2 year old chocolate lab that I cannot wait to get. Choco lives in Colorado Springs right now with a family that loves him however they are so busy with life they do not get enough time to be with Choco and he needs attention. My intention is to bring Choco into the Cafe of LIFE with me on a daily basis to be part of our LIFE parties that happen everyday. I am glad he is already 2 as he will fit into my life better than a puppy at this point. Choco will love some of the places that I hike and will get me back in my running sneakers. HE will have the lake to explore at my mom’s house and 200 acres of orchard to explore at my dad’s house and a cousin named Walter to play with. He will arrive in Detroit by plane around December 1st. You will meet him very soon!

DURANGO

Durango, Colorado!!! I visited such a wonderful place last weekend I have to share with you. It is a small town in southwest Colorado, very near what they call “The Four Corners” where Colorado, Arizona, New Mexico, and Utah come together. I guess there is a monument there that you can straddle with your arms and legs and be in 4 states all at one time. I didn’t make it there however I did get to explore the area. Durango is a very conscious city. The people of Durango pay attention to what they eat and how they treat the land and environment. They recycle whenever they can, ride their bikes if it is possible, and respect others. It seems that many people are questioning standard western medicine there, thus leading to healthier births, childhoods, and lives in general. I have friends that practice chiropractic there in the city and are loving every minute of being in their small piece of paradise. Though it is more than a hop, skip, and a jump to get there, if you get a chance to go, TAKE IT!!!