I am living wholehearted.
I am nine weeks post heart surgery. It feels crazy to even be able to say something like that and it has been an incredible shift in my life!
14 years ago I was diagnosed with what is called a Patent Foramen Ovale, a congenital heart defect that is present in twenty percent of the population. Many go un-diagnosed and often the first sign is stroke. I feel very fortunate to know this info and I also feel really fortunate that I didn’t have to have a serious incident in order to get this information.
Playing sports growing up, there was clearly something wrong but they just lumped it into the group called “exercise induced asthma” and “when you start gasping and wheezing (which was happening all the time on the soccer field especially) take this inhaler.”
The inhaler never worked, never made a difference except just to make me shake…and be more frustrated because I still couldn’t catch my breath. I continued to play sports and excelled regardless.
When I was 12 years old, I started getting migraine headaches. I can remember my very first one as I woke up around 2am one morning and told my parents “It feels like a bowling ball hit me in the side of my head.” At 12, those were the best words that I could come up with to describe that pain. The migraines have happened anywhere between 2-10 per month since then.
I am sure there are some migraine sufferers out there reading this that know the kind of pain I am talking about, debilitating to say the least. I learned through the years just to deal with them and after the first few years, I still had the same level of pain but I never let it stop me. Life, school, tests, finals, patient care…nothing stops just because I have a headache and pushing through all of it has always been the way I handled them…and most other things in my life.
Shortness of breath upon exertion and migraine headaches, combined with numbness into my hands (which would come and go since my late teenage years) are the classic symptom group for Patent Foramen Ovale and I tested positive. To top all of these symptoms off, chronic hypoxia (lack of oxygen) was the over-riding theme since the blood would just skip the trip to the lungs altogether. On a scale of 1-5 for the size of the hole, I tested as a 4.
I scheduled to see the cardiologist 14 years ago and was looking forward to having all of these things improve for me through a surgical procedure where they inserted a patch in the heart. His exact words “I make a lot of money doing these patches but we do not have the research of what happens to the current devices 30-40 years down the road and so if you are not suffering every single day, don’t do it.”
I was bummed because I was truly looking forward to a shift for me, but I was going to listen to the expert.
I revisited the idea and the tests and all of the procedures this past fall. When I went back to the same cardiologist he said “We have the BEST devices now and so YES!!! …considering how you test and just how compromised you are, lets do it!”
I know what you are thinking out there, “How compromised is she? She has done all these things with a hole in her heart, long distance running and biking, hot yoga, taught aerobics classes for 10 years, even climbed Mt. Kilimanjaro! How is that possible?”
I am (well was) VERY compromised but was going to do all the things anyway because that is the fabric I am built from. I do my best not to let anything slow me down.
November 21, 2019 I went under the knife. This is the procedure they did.
The cardiologist wanted me to take on Thursday off work to have the procedure done, stay the night, go home Friday and head back into work on Monday the 25th. Unbelievable to me in the moment he had said that but that is exactly what I did, and I probably saw many of you that day!
I didn’t share much about this ahead of time for the simple fact that the words “heart surgery” freak most people out. I wanted to get through it, survive it and then tell the story when I can really share the details.
This post is getting lengthy and so I will leave this info here for now and then I will share more in the next post.
When you take a moment to do the math of chronic hypoxia my entire life and never slowing down, to getting full amount of oxygen moving forward, you can see how great of a thing this is and the how freakin’ incredible the medical profession is to be able to develop a fix like that video I shared. Literally I am now finally living wholehearted.
